Royal Cuckoo

December 22nd

There's an energy in the air
Chestnuts roasting on an open fire.

“It’s the Christmas lights”

An unassuming pianist enters the room. 

“How do you know he’s a pianist?” 

He looks the part. His glasses sit low on his face.
He's prepared to read his music at all times. 
A brief greeting with the bartender and he slips behind us to get to the piano in the back.
Everything in here is a tight squeeze.

“The piano fits the space nicely”

Our performer takes his seat, opens his sheet music, and leans in. Charlie Brown Christmas. Mama’s favorite. 

“What did you say this place was called?” 

I visited my cousins twice a year growing up. 

Once for Thanksgiving and once for Christmas. 
Like many, these were the grand slams of our family gatherings. All of the cousins and a set of grandparents from both sides. 

As we grew up, time spent with my cousins moved from video games in the basement 
to sitting in the living room and talking for hours.
Time spent at Royal Cuckoo Market feels the same way. 

Royal Cuckoo Market is not to be confused with The Royal Cuckoo, proper. Both are institutions for feeling cooler than you are. The Royal Cuckoo is someone's favorite cocktail in The Mission. Royal Cuckoo Market is my favorite marketplace/wine bar/coffee shop in The City. 

Located between two robust properties, Royal Cuckoo Market looks small.
The walls are tight and lined with bookshelves.
But the ceiling is high. 
It feels like you’re tucked in the back of a library 
and they’ve just dimmed the lights to close. 

Royal Cuckoo Market is also quiet. The space must be well insulated. Assuming the market’s neighbors are also insulated, we are left with an extremely small space that is double insulated on both sides. 
It's like a recording studio in there. 
I find myself hanging on every word of my friends' stories, appreciating the texture and timbre of their voices. Music at the market sounds clear and full, especially live. 
I don't often take note of a bar's acoustics —
Royal Cuckoo Market has great acoustics. 

The Market's shelves are populated by a collection of knick-knacks that mostly reference horses. I don’t think I would find them appealing in a thrift shop, but they’re perfect here. 

Nestled among the various knick-knacks is the market's retail offering. Locals will pop in for a bottle of natural wine or a pound of coffee, accompanied by a warm welcome and farewell from the market’s regulars (Everyone in the place.) 

At the back of the space there’s a piano and a couple seats reserved for accompanying musicians. Royal Cuckoo Market is at its best on the nights these seats are filled. 

I write all of this knowing that I am doing a friend a tremendous disservice — we were shown Royal Cuckoo Market on the condition that we do not blow up their spot.

If you do choose to visit, I only ask that you bring along those closest to you. This is a place for moments in time that you wish could last forever. I am willing to put that to paper knowing that it sounds like it was written by a Disney adult. It's true. This is the happiest place on earth, where dreams come true.